Sunday, May 24, 2009

An Extraodinary Movie Outing

When my wife mentioned she badly wanted to catch a show I realised it had been roughly 20 full moons ago since we caught one. How is one going to manage a baby, a pram, 1 milk bottle and a bag full of baby toiletries in a theatre? I would like to point out Adiddas’s current marketing tagline, “Impossible is Nothing” is a total BS (bullshit) in this context. No one can manage a new born baby in a cinema.

Years ago, the forum section under the local newspaper sparked a big debate. Some idiots actually brought their babies to the theatre complete with prams parked alongside the seat aisles. Fellow Singaporeans have been accusing these parents as inconsiderate, selfish and dumb sods. Being the carefree much younger designer without parenting responsibilities, I couldn’t care less. All I cared was where to hang out on a Friday night and how to hang a crying baby when I am watching X-Men. Heck, I even almost agree to the insensitive comments hurled at those parents.

Now I can empathise with the accused.

I too, badly wanted to bag a heap of popcorn in a cinema watching the latest blockbuster. But with a baby daughter lugging around during our every available off days, this can only be happen in dreamland. Yes, even a simple leisure such as catching a show is merely a talk in the air these days. Parenting does come with many things, joy, excitement, fun, and of course sacrifices.

So you can imagine the ‘shiokness’ when my wife and I were slumped onto the seats of Cathay Cinema yesterday during an office afternoon hour (We decided to screw work and just go for it). A lover’s combo means a bag of popcorn and 2 soft drinks, and that was just what we had... but alas it was not for long.

Barely 20 minutes into the show, Ben Stiller was just trying to budge into the archive levels of the museum (We were watching Night at The Museum 2), and then everyone sitting in the theatre were asked to move our ass out of the cinema promptly.

A fire had broken out. The whole mall had to be evacuated. Sluggish and annoyed cinema goers thronged out of the multiplex to be greeted with a smoke-filled shopping centre. And suddenly everyone wasn’t so sluggish anymore. Everyone was becoming excited! How often do you get to be trapped in a fire broke out mall on a Friday afternoon? Especially when you haven’t been to a cinema in eon years and you finally decided to skip work to catch your favourite movie only to be kicked out of the theatre seats you barely warmed (pointing the finger at myself of course). And imagine if you were doing your mani and pedicure and you had to be ushered out of the shop dripping nail polish. What about those in the salon having their hair colored mid way? Hordes of them would be scrambling out of the shop in multi-colored procession. How totally awesome is that?

In the midst of evacuation, I saw kay pohs snapping photos everywhere with their cam phones, I saw excited aunties excavated from hair salons still combing their wet hair as they sashayed down the escalators, and I witnessed SCDF fire fighters with their water hoses combing the top floors of the mall as my wife and I descended from the topmost cinema level among the crowd. I only had one thought in my mind then, “I don’t want to die.” And the imagery of my daughter’s face hogged my entire vision. I kept thinking “I don’t want to die...”

Perhaps to kill off the dramatic scenario, what I saw when we climbed down from the higher floors to the lower basements was business still going about. It was quite clear smoke had reached these areas but most shoppers maintain indifference. Wow, this is the true Singapore spirit I thought to myself. Never mind the chokiness I can manage, but take away my shopping and I will die. Instead, let me die shopping. All right folks, you can continue to hunt for your bargain blue ray DVDs; I still want to be alive to see my daughter.

Both the missus and I scrambled out of the mall and drove out of the car park like a pro racer. In the process of it, I renacted Vin Diesel in the movie “Fast and Furious” pulling off a car park stunt because a fellow driver was stuck at one of the exit gantries with a undervalued cashcard. I had to swerve out of the queue and cut into another gantry lane like a GTR racer. Yes, a rather selfish act it seems, but returning home to Baby Angel with a full intact body was my priority, besides I did it with a skill act that could have put Vin Diesel to shame, ahem, because I did it without obstructing any fellow motorists. (Alright, I suppose any lame excuse counts when one is scrambling for his life)

Outside, we saw 2 fire engines and the excavated crowd. Interestingly, we saw some more cars trying to drive into the mall. Yeah, long live the Singaporean shopping spirit, my deepest salute to fellow countrymen with such steely determination with regards to credit card abuse.

Finally, we arrived home safely with a cup of ‘Zapple’ still in hand. And more than happy to greet our baby Angel with opened arms. This is indeed one extraordinary Friday afternoon for us. We might really have a higher chance striking the 4D, like I said how often do you encounter a fire while catching a show. Speaking of which, the missus is still sore over the incomplete movie outing. But that's gonna be another excuse for another slack afternoon...

Probably “Angels & Demons”?

Yeah, it’s gonna be Vin Diesel meets Tom Hanks. (guffawed laugh) Well, I can sense the mockery coming from you guys already...

21 comments:

foongpc said...

This means only one thing. You and your wife are not supposed to catch a movie at the cinema. Otherwise, how could a fire break out when you and your wife finally get to watch a movie together? Haha!

Hey, as a blogger, where are those pictures of the fire? You know bloggers must risk their lives just to post interesting photos for their readers. Haha, juz kidding! : )

Actually, I would curse any couples who dare to bring their baby into the cinema hall and disrupt my movie watching. I just hate disruption in the cinema and babies crying tops handphone ringing in my list of cinema annoyances!

Btw, do you really need to drive like Vin Diesel when shoppers in the mall are still shopping happily despite the fire? LOL!

::. Anton ::. said...

Eh Vino Common, you can be so dramatic one ka? lolz

If I were at the same cinema and Angel started crying, I'd give Angel a kiss but give you a boot up your Vino arse! lolz

+Ant+

A Common Singaporean said...

Foong - Yesterday night both my wife, Angel and myself were passing by a big digital board outside Orchard Road's Lido Theatre. It was running 'Night at The Musuem' trailer!! hahahah you can imagine my wife's expression. Anyway I promised her we'll take care of this unfinished business some day.

Yeah. Actually me too. Handphone ring tones are the most annoying!!

Its just an excuse to drive a little recklessly. I haven't sped in car since my daughter was born.

Anton - Just wanna laugh the whole situation off. It was quite an experience. But when I saw roller shutters shutting down from shop to shop and people dashing for the escalators I got worried. Suddenly it wasn't so funny anymore.

Yeah, if you spot a punky head wearing an Armani T shirt in the cinema, that would be moi the Vino. hahaha. Don't worry u wld not find my daughter there. Otherwise Foong will come cursing me, and I am sure that goes with everyone in the theatre.

~LeuMaS~ said...

snapping photos on a fire accident? hehe~ i think twilight might do this.... :P hahaha~ dun let him see this post mentioning KAY POH... he sure will kill u :)

well, i watched xmen, angels&demmons... all of them r good movies :)

Bengbeng said...

after the fire broke, i was practically breathless followin yr story... u r the type .. u know ..the lau hero type :) in the movies u would swoop yr mrs with a train of lace hanging down the back head held high descending the escalator, with not a single drop of sweat on yr brow... and hair held firmly in place by brylcreem.

never expected u to do Vin Diesel impression n scoot away from the scene of the excitement n leave us poor readers with not a single shot of it.... i might punish u by not visitng yr blog for one whole hr :)

A Common Singaporean said...

Leumas - That's becos my phone only has a 2 megapixel snap function, and the shutter speed is like crap. If I have a 5 megapixel cam phone I'll camwhore crazy too!

Eh.. you don't have to remind me again right? Looks like I'll hv to hit the DVD in the middle of the night when my daughter is asleep...

Beng Beng - Hey man, who's the hero here man. heh heh. Protector of justice and Mrs BB savior ;) See my reply on your comment page and you might save yourself some money on those shirts. hahaha.

Btw, I don't use brylcreem no more. It's call the Moving Rubber, by Gatsby. Hee hee, but I don't have a heroic act to double that lah. I am just a sneaky driver scrambling for his ass, hahaahhaah.

Shionge said...

Hey...you call me? 'Shiokness' :D

Hehehe...you mean this is real?? Really really? Unbelievable !! What a day I must say so I bet more dramatic than a movie huh?

Glad you are both safe and that it is nothing serious.

Perky said...

I wanted to comment something but as I was reading Foong, Anton and your comments, I just lost it. LMAO! You guys r damn funny! :)

foongpc said...

Haha! LOL at bengbeng's comment. Still using Brylcreem, bengbeng? Or maybe he's just trying to depict the olden days when there are heroes like that. Now it's non-existent! : )

A Common Singaporean said...

Shionge - HAHAHA. Borrow your copyright a while ok? hahaha. Shiok is the best word here, nothing beats shiokness!

Hey, its true. It was at Causeway Point. I presume the fire was put out very quickly since I didn't see anything on the news. There was a Raffles Clinic below the cineplex filled with smoke. I reckoned it came from there. It was quite drama, everyone was evacuated from floor to floor, all shops forced to close.

Perky - The jokers are everyone else except me lah. I am the victim!!! wahahaha.

Foong PC - You'll be surprise some still swear by it. Mostly uncles... Oh no, Beng Beng is gonna kill me! hahaha

Bengbeng said...

Heroes non existent? Still gotlah. Look. There is ken in all his moving rubber Gatsby glory.

But one sad thing though. Tonight I rushed a traffic light n guess what? A police car was waiting for me :(

A Common Singaporean said...

Beng Beng - I am sorry to hear that bro. Did you get a ticket for that, or did they let you go with a warning instead?

Bengbeng said...

actually the policeman was busy issuing summons to a few others I think he missed seeing me rush the traffic lights. I expected to receive a summons through the mail but so far so good. Keeping my fingers crossed. :)

::. Anton ::. said...

YOUR BLOG HAS EXPIRED!!!!!!!

+Ant+

foongpc said...

haha! Agrees with Anton! No updates??

Leu said...

hey ken, i'm going to singapore next month... can we meet up? i wanna see baby angel :)

A Common Singaporean said...

Anton & Foong - I know :( I'll do a small update soon! Meanwhile feel free to visit my design blog and play around with some of the productions under the links ;) Cheeros!! www.fatherkendesign.blogspot.com

Leumas - Hey man, we'll definitely hook up!! You got my number already right? Let's go PARTY!! And rock the house DOWN!!!! (No lah, how possible with baby Angel, hahaha. But we'll meet, for sure!)

::. Anton ::. said...

Patches of mould and fungi have begun to appear on this blogspot! :P

+Ant+

A Common Singaporean said...

Ant - Yeah... I smelled it! haha. Updated as of today. Cheers pal!

Twilight Zone said...

Kaneeneh CCB got ppl quote me as the kay poh? Wait till I tear his hair out.... LOL

A Common Singaporean said...

Twilight - hahaha. I am leaving my hands out of this!

I stay neutral!